Summer 2023: When my life fell apart

Happy Fall, everyone!

It’s been a while since you’ve heard from me in this newsletter format. It’s been for good reason. This summer was the second most intense 3 month period of my personal life, and I could not seem to catch my breath from tragedy, challenges, and a never-ending to-do list.  

I didn’t share a lot with folks outside of my inner circle about what was going on for me, and that’s because I was deeply overwhelmed, grieving, and trying to put one foot in front of the other as a mother and an entrepreneur. I had to put on a good face and keep it moving, as most Black women do, and I literally didn’t have the time to process or to sit still and honor my feelings and thoughts. 

However, mid-way through the summer, my body decided to stop me. I navigated a tremendous chronic illness flare which literally rendered me virtually silent, as in “unable to speak” for more than 5 days. Of course, as you read this, I’m sure you’re alarmed, and thinking “How awful, Takiema!”  

It was truly awful and excruciatingly painful.  

AND, something else happened to me in that period of silence.

I had no choice but to dig deeply into my inner resources, my community, and my faith in my body’s ability to heal. I journaled, meditated, took long walks, and let myself feel all the feelings I had been suppressing for too long. I let my community know how much I was hurting and accepted their support and care, fully. I thought hard about my relationship to my work and purpose in life,  and what I want a work-life balance to look like moving forward.

Then, in mid-August, I was able to attend a spiritual retreat with Zayda Rivera (that had been planned well before the intense summer of 2023), and I experienced healing and clarity that I didn’t even realize was possible.  During our opening circle we were asked to set intentions, and what came to me are the following intentions that are shaping my life now, and for the foreseeable future:

Be present

Do less

Trust healing

Have faith

Images in order: Palm tree on a beach, Goddess of Eden vegetable platter, and Takiema at Playa Fortuna Beach in PR

During the retreat, I also decided to commit to something I had been considering, but was scared to do: I would take a two-week mini-Sabbatical starting in late September, to rest and re-set around my work and my work-life balance.  

It was not an easy decision to block out my schedule from external-facing work for this time period. As a full-time entrepreneur, I often feel like I need to work constantly because the buck truly does stop with me. I also felt antsy about clearing my calendar to make time for exercise, meditation, and play. 

However, I am now coming towards the end of that mini-sabbatical, and I am so grateful that I decided to do it.

I have more peace and calm in my head and my heart. 

I have been paying attention to my body and my invisible-yet-very-much-noticeable-to-me chronic illness.  

I have more clarity about how I need to work in this world without burning myself out again.  It is a process, and this is my journey.  

I felt even more clear that this mini-sabbatical was the right thing to do when I recently spoke with someone who felt themselves getting sick, but said that they could not stop working. They could not stop because as a person of color in a leadership role in a white-led organization, they said  “My sick days are not like white people’s sick days”. 

That people of color are forced to continue working in organizations that maintain oppressive cultures is truly tragic to me.  In my executive and leadership coaching work, we dig into these manifestations of white supremacy culture in organizations, and leaders access knowledge and strategies to shift towards authentic equity, diversity, and inclusion. 

A final thought and request: this morning I posted the image below on Facebook, and the first 3 words I saw were: gratitude, connection, and self-care. These are definitely my mantras for October, and beyond. There have been so many comments with people posting their 3 mantras!

What are the first 3 words you see?  

If you like, reply to this email and let me know.  I will affirm them for you and wish that they be so. 

What we are up to:

A huge high point of Summer 2023 was the Journey to Nia Retreats we held in August. Both the in-person and virtual retreats were deeply impactful, and participant feedback has been overwhelmingly positive!

Participants are currently having their organizational consultations to individualize and embed the learnings about how to center Black joy and eradicate anti-Black racism in early childhood into their lives and work. 

If you and/or your organization are interested in the Summer 2024 retreat, fill out the interest form and we will get back to you.  Early registration incentives will be announced soon!

Executive and leadership coaching

We currently have a  few slots open for executive and leadership coaching (individual and cohorts).  

If you or your organization is looking for support to navigate organizational challenges or transitions, implementation of a new vision, or other leadership concerns, send us a short note and our team will reach out to you.

Resource Corner:

I am an adjunct assistant professor at NYU Wagner School of Public Service, and I teach a course called “Strategic Leadership”.  One of the readings I assign is “Black Magic” by Chad Sanders. I highly recommend this book for anyone who wants to think more deeply about the various experiences of anti-Blackness and white supremacy that Black people can have in life, and in organizations.  Also, it pushes readers to consider what could be done differently to create organizations where Black folks can truly thrive. 

Thank you for reading our newsletter! Please share it with your networks.

Towards joy and liberation,

Takiema and Team Anahsa